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Poetry

Poetry

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

College Essay: Im mad proud of it...


Success Equals Impact

All I could see in almost every dream in weeks past and at this particular moment was silly string, colorful balloons, streamers, disco lights, party favors, candy bags, masks, face paint, and more because it was almost time. It was twelve noon and I knew there were only eight short hours left until the anticipated moment. People were running around like chickens with their heads cut off ; running to pick up the cake, decorating the dance studio, putting up the lights, printing up the guest list, preparing the food, and paying off the dancers and cleaning crew. I had a racing heart and a million missed calls on my mind and I chose to pick up the worst phone call at the moment when my anxiety level was at an all time high.
The DJ called to cancel. I couldn’t believe it. His excuse was legitimate, so I couldn’t blame him, but what was I going to do? I automatically called every friend in my phone book until I found about four possible DJ’s and called one after another. Finally, I found the perfect DJ and I was excited and nervous because it was just an hour before the party.
 At that moment I realized what I wanted my life to be like: anticipating, frightening, surprising, engaging, and exciting. Life will always be fraught with chaos and uncertainty, but at least if I follow the dream of becoming an event planner it will be the only place I will feel that I have control over where I am headed. I was raised by a strict single mother and because I lived in a dangerous area, as a teen the only friends I grew to know were from my school. My mom didn’t allow me access to a community of gang violence and of children who have no choice but to grow up faster than they should. Although my mom had good intentions not being able to explore my surroundings and neighborhood has disabled me from having more experiences and encouraged me to want to help my community rather than stay away from it which is why I planned to have the party in my community.
The party helped me prove to my mother that people in my neighborhood could have a public gathering while being safe, having a good time, and realizing that there is more to our community than gang violence, hardship, and struggle to succeed at living. Because the party was such a success with bringing everyone together, I know that it is possible for there to be a change in the stereotype of my community being too dangerous to have a safe and fun gathering. I don’t want to lose my personality in the end to achieve success.  I’ve realized in school that my personality and where I have come from  has not only made me the achiever I have become but has presented me with  a goal that will help me live a comfortable and successful life while helping my community.
I am the only one in my family who decided to pursue a goal and follow it before ending high school.  I knew what I wanted to do, so I took advantage of school and community service opportunities to start clubs; that way, I’d have the chance to plan events and fundraisers. I chose to find ways to event plan daily because I didn’t want to be like my family members who live paycheck to paycheck because they always said that they will eventually return to pursuing their dreams but never did.
With an education I plan to start a non-profit teen-run event planning business for the teenagers in my community. All of the profit would go toward scholarship funds named by the teenagers in the business. I want adolescents in my community that aren’t given the chance with their schools to be able to intern with the business and help the areas in which they live in around Boston such as Dorchester, Roxbury, South Boston, Mattapan, and more. They could even learn to plan events for their school so they are able to write about it in their college essays.  
People always ask me if I want to be successful. The truth is, people usually describe success as making money and having flashy possessions. Because of the environment in which I’ve grown up, my goal isn’t to be successful based on what society defines it as but rather successful based on what I want my society to become. If I can make an impact by changing my community for the better, then I will be successful.



Monday, August 24, 2009

Disrespect: Woman in the Hip Hop Industry

                “ You wouldn’t get far, Fuck’in them rap stars, you know who you are put your hands up ladies, you wouldn’t get far, if you got your legs closed, It would be just a waste of time, and you know, you wouldn’t get far.Far.Far.”(The Game) The Game, a rapper out California that signed to G-unit (a well known label owned by Dr. Dre and Eminem), wrote this song, representing all of the women in the Hip Hop and R&B videos. If one rapper in the Hip-hop industry opinionated woman to be as promiscuous as in the song, imagine what other artist and people think about women in general. In the hip hop industry, whether it is a Video Vixen, a female artist, or even a male artist’s view on women in the industry women just don’t get enough respect. The time period of women in the music industry or women degrading themselves may have an effect on the disrespect women have been receiving over the year, but the media and what sells also has a lot to do with the disrespect as well. Women have without doubt lived up to there standards of being useful for one thing in the hip hop industry and there are many women that promote it and, but there are only a few of these women that fight it. Video Vixen is where most of there battles are unrecognized as much.
    Video vixens are young and exceptionally old women that promote themselves in the music industry, most commonly music videos, to make money or to be known to the world. Some do any thing as a video vixen to get known even more. Karen Steffans, Melyssa Ford, and Buffy are just a few of the video vixens that are most known in the hip-hop industry. The reason they are well known is because of their status to the artist that they have worked for or their own success. Karen Steffans is the author of, the top selling book, Confessions of a Video Vixen and the most popular Video Dancer in the industry because of her success. She also appeared in numerous amounts of videos such as Danger by Mystical, where she danced nude. Karen Steffans acted as Lorenz Tate’s wife in A Man Apart starring Lorenz Tate and Venn Diesel. In her novel, The Confessions of a Video Vixen, Steffans confesses that she has slept with a number of actors and artist to get where she is today. A list of these actors and artist consist of Jay-Z, Jarule, Shaquille O’Neil, Bobby Brown, Lorenz Tate, Venn Diesel, and Ray J. That was just listing a few.
Buffy is another Video Vixen. Her nickname is “Buffy the Booty”. She was in the video So Seductive by Tony Yayo and 50 cent who just happen to be a part of G- Unit as well as The Game at the time. (106 & Park). Tony Yayo in fact tried to cover the fact that he was degrading her by applauding the fact that he had a beautiful black woman in his video instead of a Brazilian or Hispanic light skinned woman. (106 & Park).
 There are many female dancers who are trying to follow their dreams by dancing to choreography in music videos and there are also females that use what they got in videos to get what they want. These women are the women who make it hard for the females that want to dance to make something of them selves other than an object to look at.
The females that degrade them selves’ not only make themselves look bad but they ruin the success for the dreamers because when the dreamers apply to dance in videos there are expectations. Karen Steffans explains this when Jay-Z takes her away from his Video set and expects her to have oral sex with him (47). When Karen Steffans did what Jay-Z expected she raised the expectations of a dreamer. There are various more ways that women have degraded themselves in the Hip-hop industry other than being a Video dancer who gets paid for doing more than dancing.
 Female artists today also degrade themselves in their own music. When they do this they put themselves down and the women that are in their video for the song. A number of female artist in the hip-hop music industry today include Lil’Kim, Shawnna, Remy Martin, Eve, and Beyonce. Some female artist that paved the way for these artists are Mary J. Bligde, MC Lite, Faith Evans, and some other old school rappers and R&B singers. Female artist today not only lower the standards for woman in the industry with their songs but woman in general. For instance, Shawnna is a rapper out of D.T.P (Disturbing the Peace), a label led by Ludacris. Shawnna’s last to best selling hits were Shake That Shit and Getting Some Head. Getting Some Head was one of the top selling because it grabbed people’s attention. In today’s society this is what sells, sex, no matter how disrespectful it can lead to the music industry being.
Another artist that’s songs are disrespectful is Lil’Kim. Lil’ Kim is both and old time rapper who chilled with Biggie’s crew and a rapper out today. Biggie was a rapper out in the late 80s and 90s who associated with P. Diddy, Lil’ Kim, Faith Evans, and the Bad Boy music company. Bad Boy Incorporation was his crew. Lil’ Kim started making herself seem promiscuous a long time ago when she used to hang with only men rappers and the only subject of her songs were having different types of sex with all of them. Some of these demeaning songs are How many Licks, No Matter That People Say, and Jump off. Lil’ Kim has a nickname, The Queen B of Hip hop, meaning the head dog in charge. She is well known for wearing scandalous outfits that have one of her boobs hanging out or is just very revealing. Lil’ Kim is one of the female artists that paved the way for women to be recognized as objects or accessories to be used for on purpose.
 One more example of a female artist that is recognized today is Remy Martin. Her rap name is named after hard liquor. She is apart of the rap group called Terror squad. Fat Joe, a rapper out of Brooklyn, leads Terror Squad. Remy Martin’s last big hit was Conceited which had lyrics that tainted women. Mary J. Blidge, MC Lite, Alicia Keys, and Beyonce are some of the few female artists that did not show their body to get where they are today. They also didn’t use explicit lyrics in their songs for them to sell. These female artists have been to the top and back without degrading themselves so this brings up the question of why do current female rappers feel that sex is the only way to make it to the big time.
    Females diminishing them selves sometimes reflects on what the male artists think of them. Most female artist out are the only female in their crew. A crew are the people that artist are also ways around. A crew is sometimes based off of what record label an artist comes from. Each record label usually stick together in videos and on music tracks. For instance, Eve is the only female in Ruff Riders; Remy Martin is the only female in Terror Squad, Lil’ Kim doesn’t even have a crew and she chooses to make music with mostly men, and Shawnna was the only female in DTP until Shareefa (another female rapper) recently came out this year of 2007.
Olivia is one more female that is surrounded by men because of being the only female in her crew. Olivia just left the groups recently because of the disrespect male rappers have towards females. Olivia was apart of G-Unit until recently. Olivia left the group because the rappers in the group expected her to have sex with them. Olivia was not going to be like the Video girls that the group hired or like the female rappers that consider themselves as sex objects, so she decided to leave the group. Olivia is an R&B singer.
Men in the music industry don’t seem to have respect for woman. It seems like most of the negativity towards women as human beings come from the rap world more than in the R&B world. The songs “Wouldn’t Get Far” by the Game, “Touch It or Not” by Camron (Dipset), “Getting Some Head” by Shawnna, “How Many Licks” by Lil’ Kim, “Rock Your Hips” by Crime Mob, “Conceited” by Remy Martin, “Candy Shop” by 50 Cent, and more are list of songs form seven different recognized rap crews and this shows how many of them have respect for woman. Each of those songs describe women as promiscuous and only useful for one thing and the women letting them think these things about woman are only living up to the negative expectations. Male artist from the 90’s had much more respect for females.
    There are many artists from the era between the 70’s and 90’s that have impacted the world’s view on women today. Tupac impacted many modern artist views because of some of his songs, but he also respected women in some of his songs such as “Appreciated”, and “Keep Your Head Up”, but “Brenda’s Got A Baby” showed both the good and bad side of a woman. Tupac Shakur was a “gangster rapper” from California who rapped with Snoop Dog and other rappers. He also had conflict with Biggie Smalls. Both Biggie Smalls, and rapper from New York in the 90’s, and Tupac were shot. Tupac’s song, Brenda’s got a Baby, was about a teenage African American girl who was promiscuous that slept with older men who got pregnant and through her baby in the dumpster even though people could tell the baby was Brenda’s because the baby had Brenda’s eyes.
This is a specific view of how artist from the 90’s depicted women and how you can relate the views from now and then because it has nothing to do with what the male artist think but what females do and what people see them do that make people judge them to be such horrible human beings
Did women bring this (their depictions) upon themselves? The answer to this question depends on each and every woman’s opinion because of the fact that not every woman acts the same. It also depends on what the media wants and how a woman presents herself in the media. The fact is, sex sells, and because of this, women do their best to make as much money as possible. They most likely think of the situation as, the more I degrade myself the less amount of times I will have to do it. Women were taught in history that men were smarter than women and many women proved them (the men) wrong by going to college and getting an education. The women today just put women from history’s accomplishments.
    A Video Vixen, a female artist, or even a male artist’s view on women in the industry women just don’t get enough respect. Women degrading themselves and disrespecting themselves may have to do with the time period of women in the music industry. The Media play a huge role in this concept but the point is that women are not respected in the hip hop industry and that disrespect is beginning to have a major impact on what the world thinks of women in general.
    
  
      

How Janie’s Background Has Effected Her Coming of Age

In the end of the bidungsromans novel, by Zora Neal Hurston, Janie , the protagonist, realizes that the life she has created and experienced had both a cause and an effect. When finally realizing that her actions made her future “she called in her soul to come and see” the amazing outcome of freedom and agency she had finally received in her life. The family background and childhood of Janie had a major part and effect in the actions and outcomes of Janie’s life. The men in Janie’s life were the obvious climax and action of Janie’s childhood, but Nanny, Janie’s mother, and the white family that Janie lived with were definitely the  cause of them because they really had a way of persuading Janie of which man was the right man when it came to having security in her life. The two sets of people, family and lovers, in the end made the outcome of Janie’s existence.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

You Had My Back

The love of mine that I was blind to see,
Had my back and wanted me,
I was your first and last when you were my tenth,
You were my shoulder when I had no strength,
Always around when I wanted to chill or hang,
You were my red bull when I need wings,
The repair man to my soul when another boy broke my heart,
Not knowing you had it on lock when ever my day would start.
Drained my pain from a cloth full of tears,
Gave me a hand when I needed a spear.
You were my laffy taffy when my sweat touch was on alert,
You were that ketchup stain I could never get out of that white borrowed shirt,
Santa’s gift to me on Christmas day,
Anticipations of u, me, and summer at the end of may,
The reason I put lip gloss on my lips,
Reminisces of u, me , and our first kiss,
You were there when I cried on my knees,
You were my shield when I was a friend in need,
I could always count on you for wanting me, but now that I want u your no where to be seen.

-Ebony Jones

Purpose

You are my addiction,
in which I try my hardest to get as much of in my system at one time.
But what happens when your gone?
I will still feed off of you, all of you, suck in as much as I can, while you’re inside of me,
that addictive cocaine in you took hold of me.

You are my addiction.
My heart is racing as my stomach is aching from the phene you have made out of this addict.
You are my rough but fragile addiction.
Got my nose wide open and my eyes blood shot red after crying from your disappearance and remembering your hopeful scent.
You are an addict of my mind because you never stay off it.

You are my addiction. Point Blank.
I think of no other.
You are the infatuation of my soul.
The being of my essence.
The filling of my hearts hole.
The other half of my presence.
I am an addict and you will forever be my addiction.

Find away to keep my attention
is what an addiction does to make you feel all sorts of redemption.
Wanting to be attracted to your lengthy lines and particular verbs.
Let your ink climb on me, stretching its goals and combing my tears of spirit with its words.

You are my addiction.
The precision of descriptions and order of speech.
The crack of my heart where a thesaurus and dictionary meet. You are my love. You are my addiction.
You are Poetry.

Good Young

How could the tide that stretches out
Create a bond that surfaces amongst the level of catacombs
That free crows and create spirits for black roses to dwell in?
Feasting on what used to be breathes of flesh
Denied by a beat of an organ
Eventually replaced with depression, how?
Thought about non-consistently, but forever.

How must joy be carried away?
Pre-prediction ,
Leaves a closed innocent eye next to an open glisten
Letters giving gifts of sadness to raindrops that hit one’s face hardest.

How does knowledge hit so, shallow,
Cries hit so lightly,
Skies change transparently to moments,
One word effect one many?
Those left care nonchalantly,
But nature feels for negligence and tire.

How does an eerie sensation of giving up let you know of pain,
Does the future tell why?
In the end what does the world gain?

Why me?


-Ebony Jones

A Real Nigga

Contemplating and tryna do the explaining to a broke jigga about the importance of a real Nigga....

A nigga who is not just think'in bout a fight or pull'in a trigga is what i call a:

Real Nigga

A non conceited nigga wit experience who is conveyed wit no shame.One of dem niggaz dat aint down 4 bullshit and gamez. Dats da kind of jigga I want:

A Real Nigga

I need a MAN not a boy, a tool not a toy, I need a nigga that'll take my hand and lead me. Oh, Yes Indeed!!! I need:

A Real Nigga

Not a forceful nigga unless itz in need(LOL) u'll laugh @ dat if u know wat I mean. A big nigga in all sorts of ways: big laugh, big voice, and BIG "other things"

Bitter but sweet and rough on da edges. A man dat'll make me feel well respected. A heal'in nigga will be freed, 4 now:

A Real Nigga is wat I need!

A nigga wit atleast a little bit of class, not a nigga dats just look'in 4 a piece of "phat ass". A under cover brotha not just in da sheets. I need a nigga dats sweet 2 me and hood in da streetz.

A nigga dat likes 2 chill. A nigga dats not in it just 4 da thrill. Oh!! But I didnt say I didnt want a nigga dat likes to pay dem bills, cuze 4 one of dem niggaz I bet any bitch would go head over heels.

A nigga dat when he walks he makes other niggaz shake, not a nigga dats all talk and no action cuz dats a nigga dat'll end up be'in a mistake.

Down 4 me is what he needs 2 be, Go my back and not like me cuz opposites attract

A Rough Neck Nigga, One of Dem:

Real Niggaz

Not one of these youg'ins out in da street, think'in da hard just because da beat. I want a sensatively older dude, atleast a little older than me dats mature, but older dudes always end up leaving ya heart sore.

Older dudes may be mature, but dont let dat fool u. Atleast young'ins get 2 know u, older dudes just want 2 screw u.

Not a lower class nigga, I need a nigga from above. One of dem niggaz dat want 2 fall in love.

So I figure if u out there u should come 2 me, cuze I need a:

Real Nigga, yes indeed!

By: EBZ CHARMZ(please dont copy my poem)